Scary October

I have had a desire to watch some horror movies here in October. I thought about a top ten list or maybe this or that, but I thought I would share some scary memories of being a child. The scariest one I have is of the Lansing Jaycee haunted house that was held at the Lansing Mall. I don't know how old I was but there was a scary guy in a gorilla outfit that bent the bars of his cage and came after us. I don't remember much about it just crying afterward and all of the sudden the creature of my fears came walking out into the mall to get me. He reached up and pulled his head off and it was you. I have a lot of good memories of the LAnsing Jaycee haunted house, but that is the scariest one I remember. Love ya guy.

Update

Was pretty good with my diet on Monday. Have worked out both Monday and Tuesday this week. I have been good with my diet today so far. Spartans won on Saturday and are now ranked 20th. They face off against the Buckeyes, both teams are undefeated in the Big Ten. I don't know if the Spartans can win Saturday, but they should put up a good fight. Michigan lost on Saturday to Toledo, the first time they have ever lost to a MAC team, I know you would have laughed about that. Hockey has started and the Wings are 2 and 1, the Lions have yet to win. I am going to install hardwood floors in the dining room, and we already had tile put in the kitchen. Love ya guy!

Getting this out

It has been almost a year now. The anniversary of you going to the hospital happened last week. I have looked back on the year and have realized I haven't dealt with your passing. This post is about dealing with it. I blame myself. I really do. I was there the day the doctor suggested the feeding tube, and I helped talk mom into having it done. I don't know that anything would have changed if I hadn't been there. Maybe she wouldn't have had the feeding tube put in, and then you wouldn't have pulled it out. I have used you as an excuse for a year. i have felt cold and numb inside and rather than deal with it I found other things to fill the void. I have gained all of the weight I had lost back. I am not using you as an excuse but I kept telling myself one more this one more that. I will start after the weekend, I will start tomorrow, just eat the pizza tonight and I will be ready. Food is not the answer, I know that. I miss you, and I wish you were still here. The last thing you would want is for me to gain weight and I know that. I will start Thursday and stick to it. I will use this sight to talk to you, but also to tell about whether I was good on my diet, and whether I worked out. I have to get the guilt and sadness out of me. I don't know how to be happy when I am so sad. At least in the next few weeks we will run out of "firsts". You know the first Christmas without you and so on. I don't know if you had lived if we would have been better friends, or I would have wasted more time. Had you walked out of that hospital would you have changed? These are the questions I would ask. Life flies by at an awesome pace and nobody knows how long their trip will last. Did you have any regrets? If you could do it all over again what would you change? These deep questions I turn on myself when I think about you. I thought I would be so different than you, I wouldn't let work rule my life, I would be there for everything. The truth is, I realize that you weren't a bad parent and what you did was for your family, but I have become you. I only wish that I was as involved in the community as much as you. I wish that I could slow things down and capture some of that time. It was so much fun taking Tanis fishing, just letting the time drift by. I am sad, I do miss you, I am guilty and i am depressed. I don't know if this even makes sense anymore. I need to snap out of this funk and take care of me and my family. That is what I am going to do. Love ya guy.

Catch Up

The Spartans beat Notre Dame 2 weeks ago, and Indiana last week. The Tigers finished in last place in their division. Tanis insisted we put our inflatable Sparty out in the yard. I don't know how all of the Buckeye fans feel but my son loves it. I have had a hard week with customer service from Sprint and Empire flooring. It is crazy, but I won't go into it. We had our kitchen through the bathroom tiled. It is nice to have it done. The kitchen looks great. I spent last night hooking appliances back up. Jackie had her wedding last Saturday, but Kellie and I did not go. Things are pretty shook up in the economy right now. I am hopeful that things will settle down as the retail industry can't take too long of a shake up. I don't have a lot of fun things to talk about, I am trying to stay light hearted but some really bad things could happen if our government doesn't do the right thing (and since they rarely do the right thing I am a little nervous). Hey at least pre-season Hockey has started, go Wings. Love ya guy.

A Long Time

Time does tend to go by without us realizing it. Well a lot has happened since the last time I posted. Mom ended up in the hospital but got out. She has a staph infection and has been taking an antibiotic drip twice a day. Things are going okay for her, she got a good report from the doctor last week who admitted he was afraid they would have to go in again. The weekend before Labor Day Kellie, Tanis and I went on a little vacation. We went to Geauga Lake on Friday (the park is closed but the water park is still there). We had fun in the water park and left there to go to a bed and breakfast in Bolivar, Ohio. It was called Wild Horses Bed and Breakfast. It was a little cabin with a loft. It was nice although it was in the middle of Amish country. We went n an ill advised night hike and ended up scratched but okay. On Saturday we saw the world largest cuckoo clock, and even bought one for our house. (I managed to damage it when I hung it up, and is currently being fixed). Then we went to Lehmans hardware. It is an old fashioned but huge hardware store. It has one lot for cars and an even larger lot for buggies. This hardware store is all about non electric hardware. It was neat, we bought a large cast iron skillet, and some candles. Tanis bought some cookie cutters. After that we went to Orrville, Ohio, and visited the Smuckers plant. We didn't really have time to see much, but we did buy Tanis some JIF socks that he absolutely loves. On Sunday we went on a six mile canoe trip. Six miles is a bit much, and the river was pretty shallow in spots. They lashed 2 canoes together for us so we wouldn't have to worry about capsizing. It was fun, but took a lot of time. We then went to a lake where we rented a speed boat and a tube to tow behind. That did not turn out as well as it could have for many reasons, but I will not post them (some things can only be shared between two people). Labor day weekend came and went, the weather was amazing so sales suffered some. Kellie was able to avoid going on strike, even though the deal the teachers accepted wasn't all that good. The Lions have started off 0 and 2. The Spartans are 2 and 1. This past Saturday Kellie and I saw Toby Kieth in concert. I know you really didn't like country music, but it was enjoyable. We had a pretty long hike from our car to the concert and back again. After the concert some red necks were running their trucks through the large mud puddle in the field. It is an experience that would only happen at a country concert, or maybe a NASCAR event. On Sunday Tanis and I went to a father son bowling event held by the church. It was fun and we had a good time. Later on Sunday we got a really bad wind storm that blew a lot of branches down all around. That in a nutshell catches us up, I will try and be better with the posts. Love ya guy.

Mom

Mom had her right knee replaced before my birthday. On August 7th she had to have it re-opened because her sutures had opened. They fixed things and sent her on her way. On Friday she visited the doctor because her leg was red around the sutures. He sent her to the hospital and the opened the knee again and went layer by layer irrigating, and cleaning. Then they replaced the plastic piece between the 2 metal pieces. They ran cultures and found out she has a staph infection. She will have to wear a pump that continuously cleans the the wound, and puts in antibiotics for 4 to 6 weeks. Then she will have to take an oral antibiotic for 4 more weeks. It seems surreal. The worst part of it is that there is only a 40% chance that the knee won't have to be replaced. I know you are up there, do you think you can help those odds in her favor? Love ya guy.

Penny troubles

It has been pretty hard to find wheat pennies. I have managed to collect 4 of them so far. Love ya guy.