Response

My wife was brutally honest lately about how the mis-carriages have affected her so I am going to try and address that as well. I miss you now because I don't know how to react to this situation. We have been through them before and as always I am torn. i want to grieve but know I need to be strong for her. I want to I want to yell and be mad but at whom? This one hurt even more because like Kellie I felt this one would be different. We both felt it was our daughter in her womb. I let myself dream of days that fathers share with their daughters, what it would be like to walk her down the aisle things like that. I let myself dream and now my dream is gone. I am truly thankful for my son and my wife but at times like these it becomes so hard not to feel angry and hurt, to not long for what should be and to not feel like the universe has f***ed me. Okay, that is the most self pity I will allow. I am truly blessed, i have a job, food, shelter, clothing, and a family that loves me. I know God has a plan for all of us but I can't help but agree with Kellie when she said God is mean sometimes. It is a simple statement but we all feel our fathers are mean sometimes when he really knows better than we do what we need. Love ya guy!