I've been thinking

I've been thinking about shutting down this blog. I like to talk to you, but it seems like it takes a lot of time. I also have been thinking a little less about you. In some ways I am afraid that I will forget you. Memories begin to fade, but that Friday will be burned into my mind. I watched you as you gasped your last few breaths. I wanted to stop time and bring you around so i could talk to you one last time. It was like when your father passed, and you told me not to worry because he wasn't that sick, a week later he was gone. By the time I got up to see you it was too late to talk to you. You did respond to my voice and my commands, but we were never able to have another conversation. You gasped several breaths before you were gone. I hated watching that. I hated losing you. I didn't know what to feel, I was cold inside and you were gone. Why I've been thinking about shutting this down is because life goes on for the living. I feel that maybe this holds you back from going on. I know you went to a better place, and are making room for the rest of us to meet you there. I do not hate you. I am not mad at you any more. I just really miss you. I drove past a golf course where people were playing a round, and I thought of you. So many little things remind me of you. Following sports really reminds me of you, you gave me my insights into the kind of year the teams might have. All of the people around here want to talk Cleveland, and sports fans root for the wrong team in Michigan. As time goes i may not drop by as often, I am not forgetting you, but I have to move forward. I want you to know that cherish all of the time we spent together, I just wish we had more, another time I know. Love ya guy.